Several years…changes. Change is always the same…it changes.
I thought I was going to be famous. After all, God gave me a gift of music, a talent. I pursued that, thinking that’s what God was calling me to do. But, really, nothing happened. Nothing. Except…
I think I have. I’ve come to live and breathe more in each moment. I hope I am accepting what IS. Not trying to force God into creating my idea of perfection.
Not sure, but I think Aug. 4, 2017 was part of this. It started as a pretty good day. Grandkids were out playing with Grandpa. On a ride with him on the International Farmall H. I heard an ambulance go by. Then, a phone call from an unknown number.
Patrice, this is Rececca H. Your husband Mike has had an accident. He fell off his tractor. What???? HE fell OFF? The grandkids? No, they are ok. He fell off. The ambulance is here……..
…then a helicopter ride to Wichita…2 1/2 weeks in the hospital…rib surgery…and now, 5 1/2 months later, Mike is doing great. A bit of therapy still going on, and trying to get loosened up, and trying to get sleep patterns normalized. But, he’s ok.
Once, in the intensive care unit, we were told that he was probably going to need surgery, and he had a blood clot, and I was exhausted and left the room..terrified and weeping…. I was afraid. Afraid that I might lose my sweet husband. Down the hall, was the hospital chaplain, a young priest. We’d met once when Mike was admitted. He was on the phone, but when he finished, he approached me. I explained what we’d been told. He listened. Then he gently placed his hand on my shoulder, looked at me squarely in the eyes…his were shining and a beautiful blue…and said….”But, it will be all right!” meaning….even if Mike should die, it will be all right…at least that’s what my heart heard and understood.
It was like Jesus was saying this to me…in person.
It helped this perception of the situation and the words that this young priest had long dark hair, a beard, and was about the same age that Jesus would have been.!! But to me, It Was Jesus. and in a real way, the priest is Jesus via his ordination….thanks be to God.
Well, I changed. The prayers I was asking for…they worked. of course, they did
So, now, instead of worrying about my “talent”, I’m grateful to God for His Gifts….of Life. And Love. And my family. Especially my husband.
He’s changed, too. He’s always been a sweet, kind man. But he is more in the “moment” too.
Here I am, Lord. Change me. Mold me. Help me listen more carefully. What’s the plan today? (today, it was to fire up this blog again. …)
love you all